Unbreakable Mind & Body

Tranquilidad: Building Your Foundation of Inner Peace

• Tiana Gonzalez • Episode 40

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Peace doesn't happen by accident. It's cultivated through intentional choices, firm boundaries, and consistent practice – something I've learned through years of personal development and therapy.

In this intimate episode, I reveal why "tranquilidad" (Spanish for tranquility) has become my personal mandate and non-negotiable requirement. Growing up in a family full of passion, drama, and intense emotions taught me valuable lessons about what I wanted – and didn't want – in my adult life. While I can't control my past or change where I come from, I've discovered the transformative power of controlling my responses and creating an environment that nurtures peace.

Whether you're struggling with family patterns, difficult relationships, or your own emotional regulation, this episode offers compassionate guidance for finding your center in a chaotic world. 

Take these insights with you as you start your week, and remember that each small step toward peace builds your capacity for lasting tranquility. 

If you found value in today's conversation, please take a moment to rate and review the show – your support helps others discover these tools for building an unbreakable mind and body.

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Disclaimer: This show is for education and entertainment purposes only. This is not intended as a replacement for therapy. Please seek out the help of a professional to assist you with your specific situation.


Speaker 1:

Welcome to the Unbreakable Mind and Body podcast. I am your host, tiana Gonzalez, a multi-passionate, creative storyteller and entrepreneur with a fierce love for movement. This is our space for powerful stories and actionable strategies to help you build mental resilience and elevate your self-care practice. Together, we will unlock the tools that you need to create an unbreakable mind and body.

Speaker 2:

Welcome back to the show. This is episode 40. I'm your host, tiana, and I am so excited for you to be here Now. Today's episode is probably going to be a little bit shorter than some of the more recent episodes. In full transparency, I'm not exactly feeling 100% at my best. I'm in a little bit of a recovery mode right now. But, as I have committed to the creative process, to connecting with you and to keep showing up, consistency is always key, and I want to be here for you and give you just a little nugget, something that you can listen to and process on your Monday morning before you start your week.

Speaker 2:

Now, the topic of today's show is tranquility or peace, and in Spanish we say tranquilidad, and that has become one of my power words, one of my token words, one of the most potent, powerful ideologies, principles, interests, desires that I have cultivated for myself, and it has become a mandate and requirement in my life, in the current and also in the future. Now, you might have heard in previous episodes of this show that I have done a lot of work on myself. I've been in and out of therapy most of my life, starting at the tender age of eight years old, and I've come to realize that we cannot control where we come from, we cannot control our past, we cannot change it and we cannot control the things that trigger us or bother us. But we do have control over how we respond and react. And as I have grown into my adult life and done more work on myself and done a shitload of healing to become a better version of myself, to therefore become a better version of myself for the world, for my local community, for my network, my clients, my friends, my family and also for the strangers that I cross paths with every single day, tranquilidad is really the anchor, it's the core, it's the foundation, because without it I feel like I'm a loose cannon.

Speaker 2:

Now I come from a family of very passionate, a very passionate, wild enthusiastic lovers. Both my mom and my dad both sides of the family are just enamored with music and passion. There's a lot of fire, there's drama, there's fighting, and sometimes that intensity just goes a little too far for where I'm comfortable living and being and breathing right now. And that's okay, because I'm not trying to change anyone, I'm not trying to change my family. What I would like to do is stay anchored and rooted and grounded in what I would like to do is stay anchored and rooted and grounded in what I need, desire and require to live a peaceful life.

Speaker 2:

I've been spending time with someone who has had some tumultuous times in their life, and when they talk to me, they'll tell me I always feel better after I speak to you. You are centered, you are grounded, you are so calm. But I couldn't be any of those things especially for this other person if I didn't also see and recognize the patterns, the behaviors, the chaos, the turmoil, the strife, the desperation at times in the way that this person feels when they're stuck in certain conversations with people or when they're trying to make decisions that are in the best interest of their closest loved ones best interest of their closest loved ones and then they turn to me, and so it's really important, and I think it's important for all of us to figure out what it is that we need to feel our best and, little by little, start to peel away the layers, start to chip away and begin to say no to the things that no longer serve us and begin saying yes to more of the things that do. I've nicknamed 2025 the year of yes, and one of my dear friends, she knows who she is. She's probably listening. She also has done that. She went through a really tough breakup this year and it's been hard for her. She's significantly younger than me. We talk when we see each other and I just listen, and she shared with me that this was the year of yes, that she was going to accept more invites than not, that she was going to try new things and she was going to get herself out there into the world, not necessarily on dating apps or by meeting people in bars and clubs to date them, but simply to experience life.

Speaker 2:

And when you're doing something like that, it is really important again to remember where your roots are, to make sure that you feel firmly planted, to know that even in the midst of chaos and swirling winds around you and swirling winds around you that you are rooted and grounded and you are solid and that you have your own back. But in order for you to get to that point, you probably have to go through some shit. So, coming from a family where there was a lot of arguing and fighting sometimes there was some hitting it took a lot of effort to get to the point where I'm at now, to get to the point where I no longer accept certain behaviors. I will not entertain conversation with people who raise their voice at me. I am not going to navigate a situation with someone who is pounding their fist on the table, slamming doors, breaking things, just getting very fired up because it's not necessary.

Speaker 2:

Emotional regulation is paramount, and if you are dealing with somebody who cannot regulate their emotions, they are immature, they are acting childish and they are not facing their own demons and doing the work that they need to do. So how do you navigate that? Well, you try to be as calm as you can possibly be. You don't want to give in, because that's literally what this person is looking for. They are trying to provoke you, they are trying to get a rise out of you, they want to make you angry, they're looking for a fight and you simply cannot do that.

Speaker 2:

I have a client. He's a single dad, very successful business owner, and he's going through some shit with his daughter's mother and they're fighting in court, and he has shared some things with me that really show me how tested he is with the ex's behavior, with the way that she speaks to him, with involving her new partner into the mix, into the conversation, who has nothing to do with any of the conversations surrounding raising the daughter. So it's a tough situation for him and I remind him every time we train, no matter what you do, you must not give in to the temptation to lose your shit, because they're waiting for that, they are hoping for it, they've got the camera ready for it, they're anticipating it, they're looking for it, they're provoking you, scratching you, poking you, just trying to chip away to see when will you break. And the most important thing that you can do in that moment is never break. So tranquility, or, as I said in Spanish, tranquilidad. I love it.

Speaker 2:

And how would I define it for me? Well, first of all, my phone typically is on, do not disturb most of the day, but definitely in the afternoon and evening when I'm home, which means I'm not being pinged or alerted. An evening, when I'm home, which means I'm not being pinged or alerted I look at it when I want to look at it. I'm not being interrupted with notifications and or calls and I'm allowing my brain to relax, I'm allowing myself to do things around my home. Maybe I'm doing a puzzle, maybe I'm painting, maybe I'm recording an episode of the show, maybe I'm doing a puzzle. Maybe I'm painting, maybe I'm recording an episode of the show, maybe I'm cooking, cleaning, washing the dishes, folding my clothes, reading a book, watching a show. That's something I do too, and it's nice to do that without having notifications pop up on your phone.

Speaker 2:

The beautiful part about all of this is that you get to decide what you want your peaceful environment to be, what you want that to look like. For some people, if you tell them put your phone on, do not disturb. The amount of anxiety they get from possibly missing something important is way too much of a risk and that's actually not beneficial for them is way too much of a risk and that's actually not beneficial for them. And I wouldn't recommend going cold turkey if it's not something you've ever tried before. But you could start slow, you can do a short time interval, you could set a timer for when you're going to just put your phone down for the evening. But, more importantly than your external environment, tranquilidad is gonna stem from inside of who you are. Do you feel calm and rooted? Do you easily jump when you feel triggered or scream or honk the horn or get road rage? Don't get it twisted. I get road rage sometimes too.

Speaker 2:

I'm not perfect human being over here, but it's really about cultivating the environment that you want to be in and create for yourself and for those closest to you. And it's going to take a little trial and error, but I promise you, when you start to slow down, when you can quiet out some of the noise, when you can spend some time with yourself and really get clear on what it is you want and what do you want to create and what's the environment you wanna cultivate, you start with those things and then you take little baby steps forward, day after day, and the more you do it, the better you become at it. It's like a muscle, it's just like working out. The more reps you get in, the better you're gonna be. And in the beginning the reps are gonna look like shit, which means you're gonna to be. And in the beginning the reps are going to look like shit, which means you're going to try and you're going to get interrupted. You're going to put your phone on, do not disturb, and you're going to go right back to it being on normal. You're going to try to stay grounded, but someone's going to trigger you and you're going to react. It's okay. The best thing you can do is assess and start over.

Speaker 2:

So I know this episode is a bit shorter than usual. Like I said, I've just got a lot going on this week and I wanted to give you something to start you off on the week on a good note, but I do need to rest up and take a little bit better care of myself this week. As always, I appreciate you being here, I appreciate your time and attention, so so so much, and if you could please give the show a rating and write a review, that would be fantastic. Wherever you listen to the show, any platform you're on, if you scroll down to the bottom, there's an area where you can give me a number of stars and then write a short review or leave a comment. Those things go a long way. I appreciate you and I'll catch you on the next one.